


Lose Myself to You

by Priestlyislove



Category: X-Men - All Media Types
Genre: Before they're mutants they're lesbians...beautiful, F/F, First Kiss, Fluff, Love Confession, Mutual Pining, No mentions of powers, Short One Shot, Sloppy Makeouts, Too many flame metaphors, gay realization, probably horribly OOC
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-23
Updated: 2017-07-23
Packaged: 2018-12-06 02:04:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,048
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11590704
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Priestlyislove/pseuds/Priestlyislove
Summary: For Emma Frost, Love took the form of Jean Grey.





	Lose Myself to You

Falling in love was messy. It always is. There's no easy way to do it. Love is strange and unpredictable and impossible. And for Emma Frost, love was a wild hearted redhead who seemed to embody all things beautiful and chaotic.

Jean was quiet and studious and plain, and yet everyone wanted her. She wore sweaters and old jeans and smiled crookedly. She knew too much or too little about everything, and she was perfect. Every freckle, every eyelash, everything about her seemed to have been carefully put together to create someone who deserved a better title than just human.

Emma had never been interested in the simple things in life. Expensive girl with expensive tastes and all that. But there was something about Jean, there was always something about Jean, that sent her heart fluttering. She would think to herself that if she had a girl like that then she wouldn't ever want another earthly possession. Jean was a warm autumn wind, leaving you yearning and yet more content than you've been in years.

And Emma wasn't easily convinced by love, either. She found most matters of the heart to be intolerably dull. People would try for her hand, only to discover beneath her beauty she was cold and hard as diamonds. And they would try and blame her, as if they weren't the one who fought so desperately for a chance to see that side of her.

Jean was different. Jean saw her for what she was. Jean didn't mind. Jean, Jean, Jean. Emma’s heart was stuck on the name. Jean Grey. It was simple and perfect, like the girl who bore it.

The issue with everyone being in love with Jean was that Jean was not in love with everyone. She had a couple of flings, but mostly kept to herself. If you wanted to spark the phoenix’s heart, you had to be someone special. Emma pretended she was special, but she wasn't entirely convinced with her own charade. And even if she was, would it be enough for her?

One night, she found Jean crying. Life was cruel, even to its darlings.

She didn't have anything to say, wiping her tears away and trying to pretend it had never happened. Her sadness seemed to weigh down the entire room.

“Let's go out,” Emma offered with a small, almost hopeful smile. “Give me a night to cheer you up.”

Jean took her hand and filled her heart with fire. She set the whole night ablaze, and Emma lost track of where they even were. It didn't matter. She was with her. And it was just them. The rest of the world could burn.

“Thank you.” Jean smiled at her. God, what a smile. “I had fun.”

“I had fun too,” Emma echoed breathily.

“It was stupid,” Jean turned to face her, brushing a strand of that gorgeous hair out from in front of her gorgeous eyes. “I shouldn't have gotten so upset.”

“No,” Emma said, finding herself moving closer. It was like she wasn't in control of her body anymore, like Jean had stolen her will away. And she'd let her, she'd let her do anything. “It's...okay. Feelings are stupid, but they're real. So...we just have to deal with them. Ride them out until they go away.”

“And what if they don't?” Jean’s eyes were on her, and suddenly they weren't talking about her earlier incident.

“Then they don't.” Emma shrugged a little, too captivated to manage anything more.

In that moment, Jean kissed her.

Fire. Her body was on fire. Her mouth was going to melt, melt into Jean’s. They were going to melt and mix together and become something new. Their hands pressed together, fingers sewn so tightly that no God could separate them. Bodies pressing too, suddenly wanting more, suddenly needing more.

“I shouldn't have,” Jean panted against her teeth. She was hesitating, but could not pull away. “I'm sorry.”

“You're fine,” Emma promised. “I want it, I want you.”

“I think I want you too,” she sounded so shy despite their position and it was terribly cute.

“Let's get off the street then,” Emma couldn't hide her smile. Jean pulled away, adorably flustered, but she did not let go of her hand.

They rented a motel room, not having the patience to head back to the school. It was a dusty, moldy little place, but it felt like the best place on earth because it was theirs, if just for the night. Emma wanted to be able to call more things theirs.

Jean hopped onto the bed, untamable hair bouncing back into her face. She spoke slowly, “I know I'm not going to be your first, and I know I won't be your best, but I'd still like to be something to you.”

Emma stared at her for a moment. “Are you kidding? You're my first, you're my best, you're everything to me.”

Jean laughed, covering her flushed face with her hands. She fell back onto the bed. “I don't know how you can say stuff like that with a straight face.”

Emma crawled over her. “Because I mean every word of it.”

Jean peeked up at her. “Really?”

“Really.”

Jean looked away again. "You've always been so cool and beautiful and at first I was jealous, and then I thought I just wanted to be like you, but it's always just been a dumb crush."

Emma was nearly so caught up in her pining that she didn't notice, but she refused to let her emotions best her and had paid attention to the strange way Jean acted around her. Fear is what held her back, telling her that there was no way. Not Jean. "I didn't think you fell in love that easily." 

"I don't." Jean kissed her again, and this time it was less fearful. It was passionate and it was warm and it was love.   
“I think you've ruined boys for me,” Jean whispered, and this time Emma couldn't help but laugh.

“Honey, we haven't even started yet.” Her hand crept up under Jean’s shirt. “By the end of tonight, I'll be your everything too.”

Jean wrapped her arms around Emma’s slender frame. “I think you already are." 

And with that, Emma surrendered herself to love. 


End file.
